Dear Annie: I love my boyfriend, but I am Catholic, and he is Jewish. We have been dating for four years. My biological clock is ticking, as I am turning 29 next month. My boyfriend is not very religious, but I am a devout Catholic. I go to Mass every Sunday and observe all the religious Holy Days of Obligation.
My boyfriend said he will not convert to Catholicism but is OK with having the kids be raised Catholic. Do you think the marriage will work? I am torn, but at this point, I cannot start over and date someone new. Please help. — Feeling Torn
Dear Torn: Love conquers all — and that certainly includes different religions. It sounds like your boyfriend is being very reasonable with you, especially saying the kids will be raised Catholic. Marriages of different religions work all the time, and there are plenty of divorces in marriages of the same religion. The most important pillars of a relationship are honest and open communication, along with a mutual respect for your partner’s differences and similarities.
You didn’t say, but I wonder if the real reason you are feeling torn might be that you are still waiting for a proposal after four years. Regardless, you should see yourself as very young at 29, which you are. You have a whole lifetime of happiness ahead of you, whether it is with your boyfriend or someone else. Good luck!
Dear Annie: I would also like to weigh in on the conversation about dumping cats. We live out in the country and have had numerous cats dropped out here. Despite people soothing their conscience by telling themselves that the cat can “fend for itself,” the truth is that they can’t. This is something that must be learned from the parent; it is not a natural instinct. If the mother cat didn’t teach them to hunt, kill, seek shelter and avoid predators, they will not survive in the wild.
I have fixed abandoned cats at my own expense, given them shelter and fed them, as I will not let an animal starve. I think I speak for most country dwellers when I say we are all tired of you dumping your poor unwanted animals out here to die, or for us to take care of. Lots of communities do have spay and neuter programs, and there are rescues out there as well. I hope people will explore all possibilities instead of abandoning their defenseless pets. — Country Dweller
Dear Country Dweller: Thank you for your letter. I hope it encourages others to spay and neuter their cats.
Send your questions for Annie Lane to dearannie@creators.com.
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